I was asked, as a favour, if I would let Charlie have a go at writing a blog. Against my better judgement, and as a favour to Mom who thought it was a nice idea, I let him. Here goes.
I finally got a go wiv Bellas compooter and I’m very excited! I have stuff I’d like to say!
Firstly, I may look small but I AM NOT!!
It is a clever disguise! I am really a very big dog, a giant, HUGE macho dog in fact, and I am just pretending to be small. This is all part of my plan.
My plan is top secret of course and I cannot tell you about it without risking World Peace. It’s THAT important. Honest!
Secondly, Bella is not the boss in this house, I am. She just hasn’t realised it yet!!!
Thirdly, I don’t know what all the fuss is about the cat. She is not at all unfriendly with me!
Well, she’s not friendly exactly, but she has never tried to scratch or bite me! In fact she pretends I’m not there, which suits me just fine!
If Bella wasn’t so flippin ‘orrible about Miffy, we would be allowed upstairs and on the big bed at night. It’s so unfair!!
She needs to learn to chill out!!
Fifthly. I bark. I do not yap, I bark. And I bark because I have to, who else is going to protect Mom from everything that moves?
Bella is hopeless!
She just lies around all day, totally ignoring zombies walking past the house, making plans to eat Mom! Any one of those zombies could attack if I didn’t scare them away with my ferocious barking!!!
Zombies can take any form, even cats and squirrels could be dangerous! I even saw a zombie disguised as a crisp packet the other day! I jest you not!! The world is a dangerous place!
If it wasn’t for me, who knows what would happen!!
All in all it is a good thing I adopted Mom and Bella last year. They need me to look after them, I wish they appreciated how hard I work to keep them safe, I am never off duty.
I think that is everything.
Back to guard duty.